Even when Im wrong Im right

I swing from the chandelier, I hold on and wait for dawn. again and again
I think I like this game. playing with my mind. stop rewind repeat. faces 
haunt me. old restless bones rattling to the symphony. you know infinite 
present past i'm falling in between. holding on to the ripping seam. 
shivers running through me but dulled by medication. try to hold on to 
motivation. one two three, namasté. breathe reach reach reach for the sky. 
reproducing recycling the past over and over. try to put it all on fire 
but the demons will not die. i need to turn it all around and feed of their
energy. angle it through a crystal of rainbows. i refuse to lay down 
defeated. you will never win. even when im wrong im right.

Turn over a new leaf

Due to an awful lot of stress, and horrible internet connection I haven’t had the patience to blog lately. But now I’m back, and there’s been a change in status; I’m finally on the move! The butterflies in my stomach have got an extra set of wings. My temper is jojo-ing like a roller coaster from calm and relaxed to hysterical and back, and recently I’ve become an check-list-maniac. Chronic absent-mindedness. Focus is this week’s goal. Monday, and my backpacker sack (I’ve finally found one!) must be inhabited, and ready for take off. First stop Volda, then Asker-Oslo. September 3rd the flight leaves 0755 from Gardermoen -> Heathrow -> Hong Kong -> BRISBANE. If I’d say that I’m anything else than euphoric, it would be a lie.

Third day of vacation. This week I find myself living in my family’s new house in Tomrefjorden, which is a little fjord below high mountains, far out on the Norwegian country side. Just had my grandmother over for a cup of coffee. Her visit did me good. Haven’t seen her beautiful face for a long, long time. She had so many clever words of wisdom to share. The last ten years I’ve been lost in a turmoil. She told me that it’s time for some action. A stern look she gave me. -You should NOT look back, she said. -Never!

She made me realize more than ever that life happens, now, as I’m writing these words. I have to gain control. Nobody will ever do it for me. Have to stop worrying ’bout other peoples opinions. I’m 22 years old, and up till now this has been a very tricky point for me to figure out. Been rooted to the spot. Haunted by ghosts from my previous life. Chapter closed. I’ll burn it all all down to ashes. Now is the time to die and start a new life. Metaphorically of course. Like the phoenix I will spread my wings and fly away. I’ll be the queen of my castle. I’ve finally gained the knowledge. Life goes on. I’ll keep her words close at heart. We sure cannot be all things to all men. I’m one step closer to Australia and Vietnam. One step closer to the person I wanna be. -Happy and free from misery! Big smile on my face today. I’ll share it with you guys. Love K.

A nimble mind. Wide awake. I gaze at the world as my feet take me further. 
Clearly, I can see now. One step, then two steps at the time. Free from the 
chains in my mind. One step closer. I can feel it now. Erasing all negativity. 
Fed up with this stupidity. Self loathing is a curse. Constantly looking back 
over my shoulder - just makes it worse. Heading now the opposite direction. 
Took me a time to understand. I see a new wave is coming ashore the land.

TUNEZ TODAY: Fiona Apple – Regret, Every Single Night, Daredevil, Hot Knife.